Hi everyone, how are you doing today? it’s been a long time that I have written a long form blog. So, today I finally decided to write something, something I am proud to share with you.
Well, September is here again, the month that changed my life- The month I got married in 2018, and the month I got divorced in 2021 (Thankful and Grateful to God).
God has his own ways. Just keep believing in him. If you are wondering – where I am coming from, I would suggest you read these two blogs published last year-
Now, that I assume, you know where I am coming from, lets get going. So, as I move deeper in September, I feel so many things. The sky is still blue, but pretty blue; the waves still hit me, but I face them with courage, and most importantly there are memories that pass through my mind and heart, but I prioritize myself today, with an intention to grow this self-love going forward.
It felt like somebody has pulled me out of that dark hole.
Last September (2022), I finally got divorced from that hell of a person and was set free from the clutches of that toxic family. On one hand, I was heartbroken because of the stigma of the tag- divorce that came along, however, when I sighed those divorce papers, my life took a turn. Relax it was not a U-turn. It felt like somebody has pulled me out of that dark hole. I kissed future and courage wrapped me with the blessing of God (Shirdi Sai Babaji) and my family.
I kissed future and courage wrapped me with the blessing of God (Shirdi Sai Babaji) and my family.
The days kept on becoming tougher but so did I. It was never easy, never will be. But I took my time to build myself bit by bit, and it’s an ongoing process. I am confident that 2018-2020 + 1 year (2021 until September) was the weakest time of my life, and now strength awaits me.
Today, I won’t let myself second myself, forget myself for somebody else. Life is short, the journey is every changing and future is unpredictable, but one thing that is certain is the fact that I won’t get my life twice. It’s a one-time journey, and I can’t let anybody else hold and control the steering wheel of my life, while having me dumped into the boot.
Over the last one year, every day has helped me heal, every experience has tested my inner strength and my response to what people will say or think- as I am divorced now- has changed drastically. However, the Sun rises every day, so have I.
This September as I look back, I am thankful, grateful, and stronger than ever. I won’t say life has become easier, No, not at all. But, yes, my perspective towards myself, life, and people around me has changed.
Prayer, writing, sketching, poetry, dogs, and a lot more have helped me heal over the last 365 days. When somehow, I end up seeing pictures from the past or the memories of the bygones cross my mind, I neither lose my peace, faith in God, nor do I feel pity on myself or weak.
When I work, I feel good; I have my goals and I am working towards achieving them. I write poetry, paint, and spend time with my family and Lemon Beagle and each of these help me heal, feel good about life, and be thankful.
Having said that I would love to mention some things that are the testimony to me feeling better every day. Somethings that I think everybody feels when he/she starts healing.
- I feel that I can do amazing things in life.
- I have set my goals and I am not going to stop.
- Looking at the past introduces me to a stronger me.
- My faith in the God has grown infinitely.
- Every time I think of God, Shirdi Sai Babaji, I feel calm, positive, encouraged and taken care of.
- I am thankful to my family.
- I am never alone; God is always there with me.
- I feel excited about what the next moment holds.
- I am least worried about what others think of me.
- I am empathetic and kind to everybody.
- I haven’t let the pain harden me.
- I have started respecting pain. Pain introduces you to the power (will) within you.
- I do am afraid of trusting anybody to the extent I trusted him, again, however, life surprises you, and I believe in miracles.
- I love life.
- I give myself mini-goals, targets, achieve them and feel alive.
- I still listen to songs of all sorts- sad, happy, slow, etc. But none of them now impact me negatively by making me think of that person and his toxic family.
- I thank God for saving me.
Having mentioned so many points over there, its time I wrap this blog. Well, I don’t want to be the only one sharing my experiences. So, please let me know what’s going on in your life. Let’s share small and big wins, stories of courage, and never giving up spirit. Let’s discuss everything that inspires others to live life, be happy and stay strong.
Let’s have a conversation in the comment box.
Even if you have any suggestions, advice, or anything that you want to share, I am all ears and looking forward to it.
Until the next time we meet, be happy, live life, stay safe, and spread positive vibes. The world needs it.
Happy Reading 🙂
Loads of love and regards
Sanguine Wordsmith With A Brush